No posts for the last couple of days because I wanted to slow down, be silent more, and ponder all that is happening as I enter the final three day stretch to Santiago.  I also realized that I get online as a distraction from boredom, which is really an avoidance of rest. That seems odd, but I´ve had to learn how to do nothing, how to relax in the rest, rather than always looking for something to fill my time.

On days when walking ends around 1 and lunch and laundry are finished by 3 or 4, that still leaves many hours before bed around 10. Without a book -- I ditched my one heavy book early on the camino when my tendons were killing me -- the internet is a perfect, sometimes costly, distraction from learning the Sabbath -- that life will go on without something to do, and that I can rely on a power greater than myself to accomplish all that needs to be done.  Maybe that is why the commandment to observe the Sabbath is the centerpiece of the 10 Commandments, because it sums up the idea of learning to rely on God.  Regardless, that´s a long winded way of saying that I´ve tried to ease up on the posts.

That said, Santiago is now less than 50 kilometers away, or two days of walking. I´ve been thinking a lot about what accomplishment will mean once I arrive -- not just reaching my destination safely, though that´s important, but trying to be conscious of all that is happening as the journey winds to an end.  What prayers have been answered?  What insights were gained?  What friends were made along the way?  What changes occured in my body?  And, most importantly, how can I savor and live into all that has happened to me that I am not even aware of?  Many questions to ponder, which has made me think a lot of Mary who "pondered these things in her heart."  May is Mary´s month, and it is a good time to ponder with her who said yes to God. It´s also helped me live into a great parable, that of the man who found a treasure hidden in a field.  At once he buried it again, sold all that he had, and in joy bought the field.  I´m trying to find and to give myself to the treasures that have been discovered on the way. 

Today we reached Villafranca del Bierzo, at the foothills of the final mountain of the camino. Tomorrow we cross to O Cebreiro and the beginning of Galicia, the Celtic region of northwest Spain. While there was enough sun today to burn me slightly, since about 4:30pm we have had nothing but rain. The forecast, so says pilgrim gossip, is for four days of rain. If that´s true, I will need slow and steady feet to navigate the steep and narrow stone paths the next two days as it takes one whole day to ascend and one whole day to descend.

Interestingly, I´m on track to reach Santiago early, so I will most likely slow down. The feeling of being within striking distance of the destination is now palpable among all of us, as we start to chat about Santiago more regularly. But it also causes me to rethink why I´m here and what I´m headed for, so that once I reach the final stop I can be thoughtful about what exactly I have achieved.

Most likely, that question is more appropriately asked, "What will be accomplished in me?" because what happens to me is far more powerful than what I plan or intend. The trite saying is true, "Life is what happens to you when you are making other plans."  My prayer of late has been that the Spirit will pray in me, that the camino will walk me, that whatever I can learn will be accomplished in me. Because, most times, what I want or plan is far surpassed by what actually occurs. That, I think, is grace.

This blog is tricky. Some days I think to myself, "What insight will I share today?" That presupposes that I have an insight or that the result of insight is that it should be shared. For someone like me, it creates a disposition to try to have a revelation or some noteworthy thought.  Instead, over the last four days, I have tried to write and blog less. I have also tried to follow the example of Mary, pondering things in my heart. I don´t always know what is happening or what I am learning, but I trust that something bigger than I can imagine is happening. Life is being walked into me on the camino. The shape of rocks and the contours of human existence are imprinted into my feet, on my face, and in my heart as I do the very basic, simple things of living -- moving, breathing, seeing, feeling.

Just walking. Day after day after day. I have plenty of time, lots of time. To walk, to think, to talk, to sing, to breathe in and out, with each of millions of steps over path after path that stretches, seemingly, endlessly toward a destination that can never be fully known until it is experienced. Life is in the moving, the continual step, that eludes philosophizing -- though that´s indeed what I´m doing now, right?! -- and always beckons the pilgrim toward more, into the eternal yawn and stretch of time that disciplines me down to the very simple way of step by step by step.

God forgive me for trading living for planning, accomplishment, and bragging. God give me grace to walk the way.